Upon His Dying Day
by Ai Tennshi
Summary: A tribute to Ace and his last moments: what lay behind his tears and his smile. Spoilers for Marineford.


_Disclaimer: I own nothing recognizable from One Piece._

_Author's Note: Spoilers for Luffy's and Ace's pasts and the Marineford arc._

**Upon His Dying Day**

He could feel the life leaving him. To his surprise, it was not as tragic as he would have imagined. It made him glad to know that he had achieved as much as he had in his life. It made him proud to know that he had made it through his childish anger at his father and come out on the other side with love.

On the other side of his anger, he had found a family. No—he had _made_ himself a family. He had a father in Whitebeard and brothers in his crew-mates. He had a _real_ brother, so much more than a mere crew-mate or even a blood brother, in Luffy.

Ace blinked and saw that self same little brother; was it his imagination, or were Luffy's arms around him? No, not his imagination—he was dying in his little brother's arms.

A lump was welling up in his throat, different from all the other numbing sensations throughout his body—this sensation was strong and clear, as if every nerve in his body weren't shutting down at this very moment. Ah, Ace realized—this was gratitude. This was love. This was what it felt like to know that you were being granted the best death anyone could be granted.

When he listened for the battle, he could hear it, raging around them like a forest fire. Odd—for a moment there, he had been certain that the world had stopped. Never mind. He could tell Luffy everything he wanted to say.

So Ace told Luffy of his love and gratitude—for his crew mates, for Luffy, for Sabo, for this end which was more than he had ever dared dream he would deserve. The tears that poured down Luffy's face, the denials that were wrenched from his throat: each of these was a treasure, a piece of wonder that reminded Ace how lucky he was, how deeply loved.

He couldn't remember why he had ever wanted to push away the little brother that followed him devoutly like a blind puppy with nothing to offer but adoration. He couldn't remember why it had taken so much convincing before he realized that there was no man greater than Whitebeard; that it was the greatest honor and reward in the world to be accepted as one among his sons. He couldn't remember why he had ever resented his birth father, who had done everything he could to hide Ace and Rouge from the government; couldn't remember why he had ever felt anything but a deep, sincere love for his mother, who had done more than just give her life in exchange for his—she had given her life in exchange for the insurance that he would keep on living.

If the afterlife had been one where Ace could have seen the aftermath, he would have looked back on his death and cringed. He would have thought of Luffy's pain and devastation, being the only one of the three brothers left behind. He would have wondered at the cruelty of the world, to allow Luffy to lose his one remaining brother in his arms, knowing that he was dying to protect him. He would have looked on as Luffy lost the will to live and the courage to dream and blamed himself for not offering words that were for Luffy rather than for himself.

If Ace could have known that his beloved Captain Whitebeard would follow him within minutes after losing any will to survive with the death of the very son that he had come to save, he would have cried aloud in devastation. He would have screamed until he could scream no more, willing the universe to reverse it all, to let him have run when he still could—when it seemed as if they all might have survived.

If Ace's consciousness had lived on, he would have considered it his greatest shame to have died with a smile on his face as though he had no idea of the bone-crushing devastation that his death would bring to every single person that he loved who had loved him in return—because he _had_ no idea. In those last minutes, Ace had thought of nothing but himself and how lucky he was, how _happy_ he was. To have his comrades fighting for him so desperately, to have a brother who still looked at him as though Ace were the whole world even though he had outgrown _needing_ Ace in order to survive. The fact that he was breaking Sabo's last wish and leaving Luffy in the world all alone never even occurred to him.

Then again, if Ace's consciousness could have seen his brother in the years that followed, maybe he would have amended his regrets. When Luffy broke down in tears and cried for his comrades, any pride he felt would have been accompanied by a sting of jealousy—_he really doesn't need me anymore, he has other people more dear to him_—but he would have been proud nonetheless. He would have loved Luffy all the more for changing his sorrow at the loss of Ace into the determination that this was never, ever going to happen to anyone he cared about ever again. He would have watched Luffy and his crew and cheered them on, and understood that it was through them that Captain Whitebeard's dreams were coming true—that Captain Whitebeard had never meant to be the Pirate King himself, had simply been acting as a protector of the Pirate Age, setting the stage for a young pirate with the will of the D to finish what Roger had begun.

But all Ace felt as his body grew numb was love, gratitude and joy that his words to Luffy couldn't possibly portray with any justice. Tears leaked from his eyes as he tried vainly to convey it all to his brother. And when the love and joy settled into a haze, it didn't even occur to him that Luffy was screaming or that he couldn't feel his body at all.

Love. Joy. Bliss.

Ace smiled.

Oblivion closed in and enveloped him in its embrace.


End file.
